If you don't investigate this, I just don't know what I'll do

From Alternet (via):

While the discussion of the proposed censure of President Bush has largely focused on the Democrats' hesitance to take a position, today's debate actually reveals failures by Congressional leaders in both political parties. Republicans refuse to investigate their President's misconduct while Democrats keep waiting for Godot, hoping for investigations that will never happen.

The Honorable Mr. Feingold and Mr. Leahy notwithstanding. Gold stars for you today, gentlemen.

Feingold is doing us proud

If you can get near a TV or have high-speed access to watch on c-span.org, please do so.

He just said:

This intentional distortion of what the law really is with regard to foreign intelligence is part of the reason why something like censure is necessary, because there's a concerted effort to convince the American people that some of us here don't believe that terrorists shouldn't be wiretapped -- every one of us does believe that. That's part of the misconduct that I see occuring here.

Truth to power, baby!

Updates:

Detailed analysis by firedoglake's Christy Hardin Smith

Video clips available at canofun.com

Full video at c-span.org. [You may need to install the latest version of realplayer, and specify rtsp (Real Time Streaming Protocol) as one of the protocols it should play.]

Pilot washes hands of photographer

The cameraman who caught Supreme Court Justice Scalia making an obscene gesture has been fired by the Catholic Church's paper, The Pilot.

A Church spokesman said "what Scalia did was wrong, but the photographer was no altar boy. Mmmm, altar boy."

How to win elections and influence people?

What would you do if you gave someone absolute power for several years, and they completely messed everything up?

Not just a few little mix-ups, but seriously laying waste to everything they're responsible for.

What if they turned freedom into tyranny, truth into lies, unity into loathing, safety into fear, prosperity into debt, faith into rage, and pride into shame — what would you do?

You'd re-think your allegiance to them, right?

But what if your identity were wrapped up in theirs? Your innermost feelings about family, faith, and fatherland all tied into a seemingly awesome package of moral, trustworthy power?

And how would you feel about your complicity in having supported them? In fact, the more you feared and despaired, the more slack you gave them... and the worse their misdeeds became.

This may be one of the hardest problems for the Democrats to solve in the upcoming elections: no one likes to be wrong.

Not for nothing does Dale Carnegie start his legendary How to Win Friends and Influence People with the following point: people will do anything rather than admit their own faults, no matter how severe or glaring.

So how do we get through to the Red Staters, now that the plain facts show that their pure-play GOP government is an absolute disaster?

Because it's not that they don't know. It's that they don't want to know.

One of our senators went a little funny in the head

In February 2003, about a month before President Bush brought peace and prosperity to Iraq and renewed prestige and security to America, 85-year-old Robert Byrd gave a nutty speech to the Senate.

Imagine, telling that august body things like:

Family members are being called to active military duty, with no idea of the duration of their stay or what horrors they may face.

Fuel prices are rising and may soon spike higher.

In [a] scant two years, this Administration has squandered a large projected surplus of some $5.6 trillion over the next decade and taken us to projected deficits as far as the eye can see.

This Administration has called into question the traditional worldwide perception of the United States as well-intentioned, peacekeeper.

The war in Afghanistan has cost us $37 billion so far, yet there is evidence that terrorism may already be starting to regain its hold in that region. We have not found bin Laden, and unless we secure the peace in Afghanistan, the dark dens of terrorism may yet again flourish in that remote and devastated land.

This Administration has not finished the first war against terrorism and yet it is eager to embark on another conflict with perils much greater than those in Afghanistan. Is our attention span that short? Have we not learned that after winning the war one must always secure the peace?

And yet we hear little about the aftermath of war in Iraq. In the absence of plans, speculation abroad is rife. Will we seize Iraq's oil fields, becoming an occupying power which controls the price and supply of that nation's oil for the foreseeable future? To whom do we propose to hand the reigns of power after Saddam Hussein?

Has our senselessly bellicose language and our callous disregard of the interests and opinions of other nations increased the global race to join the nuclear club and made proliferation an even more lucrative practice for nations which need the income?

I truly must question the judgment of any President who can say that a massive unprovoked military attack on a nation which is over 50% children is "in the highest moral traditions of our country". This war is not necessary at this time.

I know it's not nice to make fun of the elderly, but c'mon. What a crazy old coot!

Cutting close to home

fair.org offers a heaping helping of 2003 victory talk from that liberal media of ours. (via)

Reading those words brings back a recollection from those "Mission Accomplished" days:

I was getting a haircut from the lovely and talented Michelle, the first person who figured out what to do with this unruly mop of mine.

The stylist at the next chair was sharing happy talk about the war with his customer, pronouncing: "I'm so glad we were right!"

Those words churned in my stomach. In his world, "might makes right." No matter the dubious reasons for the war and incredible cost in Iraqi lives and more, we were winning, so we were right.

A few days later, Michelle called to inform me she was leaving the haircutting business. And joining the Army.

Wherever you are, Michelle, I hope you're safe.

Torture logic

Fox News asks: "Could 9/11 have been avoided if Moussaoui was tortured?"

Will they ask other such questions, including:

• If Cheney had been tortured, would he have convened his anti-terrorism task force, say, ever?
• If Bush had been tortured, would he have read the Presidential Daily Briefing "Bin Laden Determined to Strike in U.S.?"

I imagine that, as I type, bloggers everywhere are speculating on such scenarios. But surely not at Fox News, whose answer to Darwin is to try to bring out the Neanderthal in us.

Pandora and the cactus

It's quite possible that the situation in Iraq is beyond a "rational" Western solution.

Nothing against rationality. It got held up in traffic and just may be a little too late to save the heroine from the buzzsaw.

We've ripped the scab off a very very old, very very bad wound. The kind that lasts for centuries.

Are we slouching toward Armageddon? Well, here's how our own Ambassador to Iraq repeatedly describes the situation: Pandora's Box.

That's swell. So, then what?

A look at the Pandora myth suggests two alternative interpretations. Pandora closed the box before a final property escaped (which it eventually did).

Was this last offering from the gods "hope" ...or a final folly, "delusion"?

Hope is considered an evil in this story because according to Hesiod it implies the control of the future, and since no one can control the future, to have hope is to be deluded. Other people think that Hope being left in the box symbolizes Hope often being humanity's only comfort.

There's an old joke where a man walking through the desert finds another man, who has thrown off his clothes and impaled himself on a cactus. He asks the naked man why he did it. The reply? "It seemed like a good idea at the time."

Well, we're naked and bleeding in the desert. We don't have much of an explanation, and there's little prospect of a painless way out.

Given that, "cutting and running" sounds as good as any alternative I can think of. Oh, and a side order of impeachment, please. Make it a double.

Clay pigeonholes Bush as chickenhawk

Rep. William Lacy Clay Jr. (D-St. Louis) wants our troops out of Iraq now — and wonders why Jenna and Barbara Jr. aren't among them:

Clay said that during World War II, President Franklin Roosevelt's sons enlisted and added: "That is a perfect example of the difference between a truly courageous wartime president and an incompetent chickenhawk who prefers to risk the lives of other American's children."

Clay also said he believed the U.S. had done all it could in Iraq, and "it's time to bring home."

Friday on my mind

Russ is ready.

Bush's homeostasis agenda

It's the most ingenious evil plot ever imagined: a runaway government does so many villainous things that its constituents are overwhelmed into a permanent apathetic haze.

Cue I Love Lucy video.

By creating so many scandalitos — each bad enough to bring down an otherwise admirable administration — they have created an unimpeachable Jenga of malfeasance .

Cue Simpsons transcript:

Doctor: Mr. Burns, I'm afraid you are the sickest man in the United States. You have everything.

Burns: You mean I have pneumonia?

Doctor: Yes.

Burns: Juvenile diabetes?

Doctor: Yes.

Burns: Hysterical pregnancy?

Doctor: Uh, a little bit, yes. You also have several diseases that have just been discovered -- in you.

Burns: I see. You sure you haven't just made thousands of mistakes?

Doctor: Uh, no, no, I'm afraid not.

Burns: This sounds like bad news.

Doctor: Well, you'd think so, but all of your diseases are in perfect balance. Uh, if you have a moment, I can explain.

Burning Bush... and everyone else

From the sadly neglected Religious Right comes a new Contract on America:

The "contract" was released at a "War on Christians and the Values Voters in 2006" conference at the Omni Shoreham Hotel, where speakers painted a gloomy picture of a war by "neo-pagans" against "values voters" for about 300 listeners.

"It's time for the values voters to tell the government what we expect of them," said the Rev. Rick Scarborough, founder of the Lufkin, Texas-based Vision America, which organized the summit. "This contract tells Congress they can count on our vote if these things become front-burner issues."

The President's feet are among those they're holding up to that burner:

"With all this discussion of marriage before the election," he said, "we just heard a State of the Union message where there was no mention of a marriage amendment."

Reached for comment, President Bush said: "I'm sorry to have let down the 'values voters.' But Bill Frist and I will be answering all their prayers with Operation End Times. This is one job that won't be left to the next President to finish."

Dial M for Motherf**ker

Just when you thought telemarketers couldn't get any lower:

The former co-owner of a telemarketing firm pleaded not guilty today to taking part in a Republican scheme to jam Democrats' get-out-the-vote phone lines on Election Day 2002.

Prosecutors say [Shaun] Hansen paid $2,500 to have employees at the Sandpoint, Idaho-based Mylo Enterprises place hundreds of hang-up calls to phone lines installed to help voters get rides to the polls on November fifth, 2002.

A few words from your moral superiors...

Pandagon has a disturbing sampling of Freeper quotes about the immigration protests, including:

No I am VERY serious about this and we all know what a non-speaking illegal looks like by now.

Sexual deviants would love for us to become part of Mexico. That way they can watch donkey sex shows and sleep with 12 year old prostitutes.

If laws are outlawed, only outlaws will have laws

It's not enough that the religiofascists own the White House and Congress and have packed the Supreme and Federal courts. Now they're storming the judiciary in toto.

Without a hint of irony or self-awareness, they held a seminar called "The End of Democracy?"

Robert H. Bork denounced the nation's "judicial oligarchy" for spreading "moral chaos" throughout the land. The Catholic theologian Russell Hittinger asserted that the country now lived "under an altered constitutional regime" whose laws were "unworthy of loyalty." Charles W. Colson maintained that America may have reached the point where "the only political action believers can take is some kind of direct, extra-political confrontation" with the "judicially controlled regime."

Looks like the Terminators really are after Sarah Day Connor.

(via)

So, why does Delta Force hate America?

Delta Force founding member Eric Haney:

The harm that has been done is irreparable. There are more than 2,000 American kids that have been killed. Tens of thousands of innocent Iraqis have been killed... no one in the U.S. really cares about those people, do they? I never hear anybody lament that fact. It has been a horror, and this administration has worked overtime to divert the American public's attention from it. Their lies are coming home to roost now, and it's gonna fall apart. But somebody's gonna have to clear up the aftermath and the harm that it's done just to what America stands for. It may be two or three generations in repairing...

I think Bush may well have started the third world war....

(via)

Aren't Republicans wonderful?

NanceGreggs at DU has some things for right-wingers to wonder about.

A rouge gallery

Brad R. and Gavin at Sadly, No! have outdone their funny and informative selves with a roundup of heirs apparent to "Box Turtle Ben."

Not-at-the-cool-kids-table admission here: I'm with Washington Post (I'm so uncool, I dont' even know to call it "WaPo") blog commenter Taniwha in having no idea about:

"where'd the nickname Box Turtle come from?"

Can anyone help a blogger out with that?

Sunday, Bloody Sunday

We're under official orders to turn Iraqi lemons into tahini-ade, so today's Bush-approved headlines for yesterday's news include...

"Entrepreneurial Doc Makes $3K Killing"

• Doctor confesses to killing 35 Iraqi police and soldiers.... The doctor said he was paid up to $100 for each act he committed.

"U.S May Qualify for Volume Discount"

• Re: claims that U.S. forces raided a political party office, "tortured" the men, dragged them out and "executed" them, a party spokesman declared "Iraqi blood is not cheap."

We'll get our crack team at Operation Iraqi Happy Talk working on today's news, which starts off with:

• At least 30 people were killed in a bomb blast inside a joint U.S.-Iraq base in Mosul on Monday, police said.

We're tryin', George, we're tryin'.

I lovermont (revisited)

When the icecaps melt
From the sludge we generate
And the tropics reach the Mason-Dixon line
You'd best head up
To the Green Mountain State
Perhaps the only place where God's good grace will shine

Pendejo

Bush has made no secret of courting Latin voters by hablaing a little Español, playing hardball on Cuba, and trying to have it both ways on immigration reform.

How's that working out for him?

La-di-da-di-day

The President gets to make up laws
La-di-da-di-day
To censure would be a grave faux pas
La-di-da-di-day

To care means you're a terrorist
La-di-da-di-day
Oh, Russell Feingold please desist
La-di-da-di-day

Shut up and pray, and pay the man
La-di-da-di-day
It's old school, like the Taliban
La-di-da-di-day

To the Bill of Rights you mustn't cling
La-di-da-di-day
Nine-one-one changed everything
La-di-da-di-day

If you fight for your rights, Al Qaeda wins
La-di-da-di-day
Just stay silent as the end begins
La-di-da-di-day

I know what you're doing on Monday morning at 9:00AM (ET)

You're calling your senators in support of Feingold's resolution. Right?

Hearing is scheduled for this Friday.

10 things I love about W

• He's sort of cute, in a Morocco Mole kind of way
• He's from America's heartland (the Texas part of Connecticut)
• He's got a ranch, and he clears the brush all by hisself
• He loves Baby Jesus (better than the old Jesus, with that "Sermon on the Mount" shit)
• He's the kind of guy you'd like to go drinking with (as long as he didn't drive)
• He makes up adorable nicknames for foreign leaders (Putin="Pootie-Poot," Tony Blair = "My Bitch")
• He's a refreshing political outsider (for a guy whose dad was President, Vice President, and CIA chief)
• He knows Saddam had WMD (because his administration is full of the guys who gave them to him)
• He knew there'd be terrorists in Iraq (once we killed 30,000 Iraqis)
• He loves your freedom so much, he'll spy on you to protect it

Revenge of the wonks

De Tocqueville: "It is easier for the world to accept a simple lie than a complex truth."

It's no news that presidential politics is marketing, and it's easier to mass-market something vapid.

For example, it's easier to mass-market a Britney Spears than a Susan Sarandon. And remember how the Dixie Chicks fell from grace when they — shudder — had an opinion? Sadly, most of the time, stupid sells.

Thus, a cipher like Reagan or Bush II can somehow seem like a refreshing alternative to a complex statesman like a Carter, Gore, or Kerry.

But something is brewing: nerd chic. We see it in the Person-of-the-Year Gateses, the ascendancy of comic-book based movies, and the groundswell around the wonky Feingolds and Gores.

Smart is becoming the new smart, so perhaps we should embrace a Revenge of the Nerds theme: "You tried the empty-suit flag wavers with their empty slogans, bankrupt values, and bankrupted treasury. Beer-buddy amateur hour is over. Bring in someone with a heart and a brain, for godsake, or this thing is gonna blow!"

Are you with me? Then, celebrate your inner Sarah Vowell, march hand in hand singing "Theme from Flood," and let's take back this great nation of ours!

The Tyranny Zone

Boston Globe:

When President Bush signed the reauthorization of the USA Patriot Act this month, he included an addendum saying that he did not feel obliged to obey requirements that he inform Congress about how the FBI was using the act's expanded police powers.

It's good you done that, George. It's real good.

Let freedom ring... somewhere else

Rush sez:

Wouldn't it be great if anybody who speaks out against this country, to kick them out of the country? Anybody that threatens this country, kick 'em out. We'd get rid of Michael Moore, we'd get rid of half the Democratic Party if we would just import that law. That would be fabulous. The Supreme Court ought to look into this. Absolutely brilliant idea out there.

(via Digby's nice think-piece on an MSM that' s quivering because of "liberal bias" fears)

Is it now official that "freedom" — as in "they hate us for our freedom" — is just a brand name for conservatives to use?

Like when you buy a perfume called "Opium," you don't expect that it really contains American-liberated Afghanistan 's #1 crop. Though I wouldn't be surprised if Rush gave it a shot.

As objectionable as actual freedom is to the cons, I suppose they'll have to keep that brand going, given what they did to that other standby, "peace."

Toast of the Beltway

That burning smell in the blogosphere this past week has been the Washington Post's "Red America" blogger Ben Domenech.

Before casting any stones, ask yourself "who among us isn't a plagiarising political operative with a history of racially inflammatory statements?"

To understand what we've lost, now that young Ben has folded his tent, consider yesterday's column, where he used his deep, insider's knowledge — and life-lessons from a college basketball coach — to explain Bush's well-earned victory over Kerry:

You don't fight "crazy" with board meetings or diplomacy: "you fight crazy with crazy."

He will be missed.

The saddest video in the world

John Greenleaf Whittier, 1856: "For of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: 'It might have been!'"

Al Gore, 2000: "I saw really fine minds not given the opportunity to reach their potential. But America is supposed to work for that person. That is what America is all about. You ought to be able to rise on your merit. It sounds corny, but it shouldn't. Why can't we do that?"

Sigh. (video)

Emission accomplished?

This blog's name notwithstanding, I'm not a conspiracy buff by nature. So, I was never quick to conclude that the Iraq War was truly a blood-for-oil swap.

But like Helen Thomas, I keep scratching my head about why a nice young man like Dubya would start this cockamamie thing.

I'm still leaning toward the Oedipal theory, that he wanted to one-up his dad by transcending the, er, "mother of all wars."

Guardian writer Greg Palast presents evidence that Bush invaded Iraq to suppress the flow of oil, to inflate prices for his greasy oiligopoly buddies.

He cites a secret, 323-page State Department plan that outlines the scheme. Is it all true? I dunno.

But this much is verifiable: as Palast reminds us, this whole God-forsaken (or, rather, God-overstocked) endeavor was originally called Operation Iraqi Liberation, or "O.I.L."

O.I.L.??? Talk about hiding in plain sight!

Jesus, that's like finding out the Katrina plan that led to fat no-bid contracts and the vanillification of New Orleans was originally called "Hurricane Allows Large Lobbyists to Increase Business via Urban Reconstruction and Throwing Out Negroes," or "H.A.L.L.I.B.U.R.T.O.N."

Free to behead you and me

Bush: "Afghanistan has now got a constitution which talks about freedom of religion."

He's got a point. The right to execute heretics is about as much freedom as a religion could want.

Tips for the last rats off the Bush ship

Jane Smiley lays it on the line. Great stuff.

My Helen Thomas fantasy

Here's an extra-complete transcript of Bush's response to Helen Thomas, who asked for the real reason for the Iraq war.

As Bush obfuscated, Helen tried to redirect, which is standard press-conference ettiquette.

Bush brushed off her follow-up comments, which weren't audible on the recording. So, we've included the interjections that she (or any other sane person) might have said:

[FH=Fantasy Helen]

"I didn't want war. To assume I wanted war is just, uh, it's just flat wrong, Helen, in all due respect. No, hold on for a second please. Let-- excuse me, excuse me. No president wants war. Everything you may have heard is that, but it's just simply not true.

FH: OK, I'll ignore the mountains of evidence to the contrary. Thanks!

I, uh, my attitude about the defense of this country changed on September the 11th.

FH: That's true. Instead of ignoring Al Qaeda and fixating on a spurious threat from Iraq, you're ignoring Al Qaeda and creating a bona fide threat in Iraq.

Uh, we, uh, when we got attacked, I vowed then and there to use every asset at my disposal to protect the American people.

FH: You also vowed to do that on January 20, 2001.

Our foreign policy changed on that day, Helen. You know, we used to think we were secure. Because of oceans and previous diplomacy. But we realized on September the 11th, 2001 that killers could destroy innocent life.

FH: You suddenly realized that killers could destroy innocent life? What are you, four years old?

And I'm never going to forget it, and I'm never going to forget the vow I made to the American people, that we will do everything in our power to protect our people.

FH: You vowed to the American people that you'd protect our people? Talk much?

Part of that meant to make sure that we didn't allow people to provide safe haven to an enemy, and that's why I went into Iraq. Hold on for a second. Let, let-- Excuse me for a second please, excuse me for a second. They did.

FH: Okay, repeat after me. Afghanistan is not Iraq. Afghanistan is not Iraq--

The Taliban provided safe haven for Al Qaeda.

FH: What did I just tell you?

That's where Al Qaeda trained and-- Helen, excuse me. That's where, uh, that's where, uh, I-- Afghanistan provided safe haven for Al Qaeda. That's where they trained, that's where they plotted. That's where they planned... the attacks that killed thousands of innocent Americans.

FH: Hey, Dubya -- you got any friends in Saudia Arabia? No? Too bad, 'cause you might want to look into the place where 15 of the 19 hijackers were from.

I also saw a threat in Iraq.

FH: You're slipping, dude. For three years, you've conflated Iraq and 9/11 with the precision of a three-card monte dealer. But "I also saw a threat in Iraq?" No sleight of hand, no debunked claims about Mohammed Atta meetings? Just "I also saw a threat in Iraq?" How fucking dumb is your base, anyway?

I was hoping to solve this problem diplomatically. That's why I went to the Security Council. That's why it was important to pass 1441, which was unanimously passed. And the world said "disarm, disclose, or face serious consequences. " And therefore, I, we worked with the world, we worked to make sure Saddam Hussein heard the message of the world.

FH: "We worked with the world?" You really are four years old, aren't you?

And when he chose to deny the inspectors. When he chose not to disclose. Then I had the difficult decision to make to remove him.

FH: What was especially difficult was kicking out the inspectors who had unprecedented access after the bi-partisan resolution had completely succeeded.

And we did, and the world is safer for it.

FH: There's a Mrs. Sheehan on line 1. You wanna take it?

You're welcome. I didn't really regret it. [Letting Helen ask a tough question.] I kinda semi-regret it.

FH: With all due respect, sir, you are monstrously incapable of regret.

Anyway your performance at the Gridiron was just brilliant.

FH: Nice save. A little smarmy patter really makes everything all right. Love ya, too.

Dick's last resort

About the artist.

Draw partner

Coming up next: our first political cartoon, drawn by Brian Daigle and written by yours truly, Vast Left.

Brian is an illustrator and a designer of everything from t-shirts to tattoos.

A graduate of UNH Durham, he has a great, moody style.

He's a super-nice guy, and he's available for freelance work. Contact: bjdaigle@vastleft.com.

Anti-semitism on the left?

A thought-provoking article from DU / The Crisis Papers.

A good question from a smart 15-year-old

"Since Bush broke the law, why don' they just arrest him?"

Is impeachment the only means of recourse for Bush's illegal wiretapping, or could, say, the FBI swear out a warrant for his arrest and lead him away in handcuffs like the Cops perp that he is?

Any constitutional scholars in the house?

Sympathy for the Devil

WaPo: "GOP struggles to define '06 election message."

We're the party that helps the disadvantaged, aren't we? So, let's throw 'em a bone.

Suggested themes:

• We told you government was bad!
• Unwanted pregnancies = more time with your grandchildren
• No spending limit!
• Turning the Great Lakes into a tropical paradise
• Everyone's a little bit racist
• Protecting embryos from your stupid cancer treatments
• We helped you forget Bin-Laden
• WWIII will make us the Greatest Generation
• Fantasy beats reality every time!
• You call it air pollution, Benjamin Moore calls it "Armageddon Grey"
• Streamlining the government, one amendment at a time
• Vote your conscience. Diebold will take care of the rest.
  
• When we try to re-populate the earth, married gays won't help
• No one could have anticipated all the shit we're going to do this time
• Don't you love baby Jesus?

Piss Pooh

From CorrenteWire (via The Sideshow):

Another in the long, long line of xtianists who talk the talk but don't walk the walk (Bennett, gambling; Limbaugh, Oxycontin; O'Reilly, loofah). This time it's heavily marketed, branded, and highly collectible "Christian" "artist" Thomas Kinkade, the "painter of light." The LA Times has the splendidly juicy details:

In sworn testimony and interviews with The Times, some ex-dealers have accused Kinkade — whose dreamily inspirational limited-edition prints are steeped in Christian-oriented themes of faith and family values — of ruining them financially while enriching himself and his business associates.

They and others also described incidents in which an allegedly drunken Kinkade heckled illusionists Siegfried and Roy; cursed a former employee's wife who came to his side when he fell off a barstool; fondled a startled woman's breasts at a signing party; and urinated on a Winnie the Pooh figure at the Disneyland Hotel in Anaheim.

"As I understood it," explained Kinkade, "what happened deep in the Hundred Acre Woods stayed deep in the Hundred Acre Woods."

Operation Enduring Torture

It took a mere trillion dollars to do it, but we've turned Saddam's torture chambers.. into torture chambers!

In early 2004, an 18-year-old man suspected of selling cars to members of the Zarqawi terrorist network was seized with his entire family at their home in Baghdad. Task force soldiers beat him repeatedly with a rifle butt and punched him in the head and kidneys, said a Defense Department specialist briefed on the incident.

"C'mon," said Rush Limbaugh, "haven't you always wanted to do that to a car dealer?"

Streamlining the government, one amendment at a time

We hate us for our freedom. This time, it's physical.

Government agents pose as Fox News reporters

From the Washington Post:

The White House said yesterday that it will discipline two government employees who masqueraded as journalists this month while scouting locations for a presidential visit to the Gulf Coast.

A Mississippi couple whose home was destroyed by Hurricane Katrina said two men who later identified themselves as Secret Service agents pretended to be Fox News journalists when surveying their neighborhood in advance of a March 8 visit from President Bush.

"They didn't show any cards or anything," Akins said. "They just came up and said they were with the media, and then they said they were with Fox. They just talked to us and asked us about rebuilding our house. Then, after everything was over with, they approached us and they were laughing, and they said: 'You know, we really weren't with Fox. We're government...' "

"We apologize for this deception," said White House Communications Chief Bill O'Reilly.

"We are in civil war"

Former Iraq PM Ayad Allawi:

"It is unfortunate that we are in civil war. We are losing each day as an average 50 to 60 people throughout the country, if not more," Allawi told the BBC. "If this is not civil war, then God knows what civil war is."

Bush explained to a group of southern Republicans: "We've started a civil war there, because we lost the one here."

Meanwhile, back in Frostbite Falls...

Fresh from her visit to Afghanistan, Michele Mitchell gave this update on Bill Maher's Real Time:

Afghanistan is going to blow.... They had six suicide bombs last Sunday. That doesn't sound to me like things are going swell.

The Taliban are burning [girls' schools] down. They're going to have an enormous spring offensive. It's coming.

Man smart, woman smarter

Did you ever notice how many of the very best bloggers are women? Jane Hamsher, Avedon Carol, Shakespeare's Sister, and so many others.

Can Lawrence Summers get someone to look into this?

Psst, secular lefties...

Remember when we started the War on Christmas?

We thought we'd be greeted with myrrh and frankincense.

Bad news, they're gearing up for an insurgency. (Via The Sideshow)

Let's take a wild guess here...

I'll bet Rush Limbaugh makes a bigger deal out of this than about the atrocities themselves.

If you listen to Rush, please let me know what he says.

I had to click

From cnn.com:

It wasn't Cheney. Damn.

Horror show

Media Matters picked up our Wag the Persian Dog story, and posted the video.

Guaranteed to send chills up your spine.

Schlock and awe

Operation Swarmer = Mission Inconsequential.

From Time:

In fact, there were no airstrikes and no leading insurgents were nabbed in an operation that some skeptical military analysts described as little more than a photo op. What's more, there were no shots fired at all and the units had met no resistance, said the U.S. and Iraqi commanders.

Gonna squirt a few?

From msnbc.com: "Some Republican lawmakers have felt ignored or bullied."

But when the chips are down, it's Stig O'Tracy time:

Interviewer: Stig, I've been told Dinsdale Piranha nailed your head to the floor.

Stig: No, no. Never, never. He was a smashing bloke. He used to give his mother flowers and that. He was like a brother to me.

Interviewer: But the police have film of Dinsdale actually nailing your head to the floor.

Stig: Oh yeah, well - he did that, yeah.

Interviewer: Why?

Stig: Well he had to, didn't he? I mean, be fair, there was nothing else he could do. I mean, I had transgressed the unwritten law.

Interviewer: What had you done?

Stig: Er... Well he never told me that. But he gave me his word that it was the case, and that's good enough for me with old Dinsy. I mean, he didn't want to nail my head to the floor. I had to insist. He wanted to let me off. There's nothing Dinsdale wouldn't do for you.

Interviewer: And you don't bear him any grudge?

Stig: A grudge! Old Dinsy? He was a real darling.

Interviewer: I understand he also nailed your wife's head to a coffee table. Isn't that right Mrs O' Tracy?

Camera pans to show woman with coffee table nailed to head.

Mrs O' Tracy : Oh, no. No. No.

Stig: Yeah, well, he did do that. Yeah, yeah. He was a cruel man, but fair.

The GOPfather

Many of my (much bigger) brother and sister blogs have cited a list of Dems who voted to censure Clinton. The point is to shame for them being too chickenshit to support Russ Feingold's bid to censure Bush for FISAgate.

A good point.

Besides donkey spinelessness, though, there's another point to observe: the GOP's complete lack of such handwringing when one of their own commits wrongs far more injurious to the country than cheating on his wife.

If you can't think of what sort of wrongs those might be, please don't operate heavy machinery.

The Repubs, of course, live by the Mafia code — closing ranks no matter what. Every vote is 100% partisan, and every budget-busting bill they spew out is rubber-stamped by the prez.

Washington Monthly's Paul Glastris has chronicled where this began:

Early on in Clinton's presidency, GOP leaders explicitly decided to make the failure of Clinton's presidency their overriding goal, regardless of, and indeed in spite of, his attempts to move to the middle. The most telling moment came during Clinton's second big initiative, health-care reform. By any objective measure, the United States had--and still has--a terrible system, which spent far more per capita on health care than any other country while leaving a higher percentage of our population uninsured than in any other advanced industrialized nation. While many Republicans were skeptical of Clinton's preferred solution to the problem, they at first accepted a responsibility to pass some sort of plan. Yet they came to be persuaded by the advice of conservative operative William Kristol, who urged in a series of influential memos that the GOP oppose the Clinton plan "sight unseen," and commit to sinking whatever plan was devised--on the grounds that successful passage of any plan would keep the Democratic Party in power. In keeping with this advice, Senate Minority Leader Bob Dole even abandoned his own health-reform proposal, the better to create gridlock.

When the Republicans took over Congress in 1995, the polarization began to get even worse....

Just what I was looking for

John at AMERICAblog is compiling the master list of Bush scandalitos. As I type this, he's received 549 comments. That surely can't be everything.

Raise your left hand...

Via Shakespeare's Sister:

When Democratic candidate for Maryland state senate, Jamie Raskin was asked by Republican Senator Nancy Jacobs whether marriage discrimination against gay people is required by "God's Law," Raskin, under oath, replied:

"Senator, when you took your oath of office, you placed your hand on the Bible and swore to uphold the Constitution. You didn't place your hand on the Constitution and swear to uphold the Bible."

Those prudent conservatives

Your grandchildren's tax dollars at work.

Even Senate Budget Committee Chairman Judd Gregg confessed "It's hard to understand what a trillion is. I don't know what it is."

Can't get that Flock of Seagulls song out of my head

On Hardball, in response to Bush's declining poll numbers, talk of wagging the Persian dog.

Tweety's guests are Pat Buchanan and the Washington Post's Dana Milbank:

Buchanan: The x question here is Iran. The president is going very, very tough on Iran. And you know he's talking about their nuclear weapons. And Cheney says they won't be allowed to get 'em. And McCain says the military option's on the table. You elevate this issue into a hot confrontation by fall, and the Republicans are back on their home court.

Milbank: It certainly would cause a rallying effect, so I mean, everything in this poll says lame-duck presidency. But you have to remember terrorist strike, national crisis — well, he's still probably not going to get tax reform through — but suddenly he's a strong national leader again. So you certainly can't rule out that possibility. You know on your--

Matthews: Could they also think he's insane?

Buchanan: No, no. The Demo--

Matthews: I'm dead serious about this. Could that be too radical a move? I'm trying to find this out.

Milbank: Every time--

Buchanan: They'd support him, the Democrats would support him. Hillary would support him, Lieberman would support him, Biden would probably support him.... I don't think he's going to do it for political reasons, but if he did do it for political reasons, you'd do it in October.

Matthews: Why? To win.

Buchanan: Sure, you'd go right up the polls. Just like, you'd go right up, you'd win the election.

Matthews: Dana, I'm staggered by the possible truth in what he just said. That a blitzkrieg-type action by the president, do something before the public even thought about him doing it, would put him on top of the heap again.

Milbank: There is undoubtedly a rallying effect. There's no way, there's no way around that.

Update: video now available.

It's better than you could do

Don't you wish you had the courage to nearly participate in the Air National Guard and the smarts to run the war on terra?

Then you'd know how to keep our enemies in their place.

Can you think of a better way to keep Iran off the offensive than to preemptively conquer — under false pretenses — the neighboring country, tie up your troops in a withering occupation, and then start sabre-rattling in their direction?

Hey, don't beat yourself up about it. He's got a lot of advisors who help him come up with this stuff.

It's starting

Dubya's drum beat for a war with Iran is getting louder. Heaven help us.

From the New York Times piece:

the wording of the warning about confrontation with Iran comes just two pages after the strategy reiterates the 2002 warning that the United States reserves the right to take "anticipatory action to defend ourselves, even if uncertainty remains as to the time and place of the enemy's attack." The juxtaposition is unlikely to be lost on Iran's leaders.

Right-wing stalwart Pat Buchanan describes Bush's Iran War itch far more bluntly:

Were this a financial investment, Iraq would have been written off and our losses cut a long time ago. But for Bush to write it off is to write himself off as a failed president who committed the greatest strategic blunder in U.S. history.

And so the president is now being offered a way out by his neocon counselors: escalate. Take the war to the enemy, as we should have from the beginning. Use U.S. air power to wipe Iran's nuclear facilities off the map. Go all-out for victory. Emulate Lincoln, Churchill, FDR, Truman.

With his poll ratings in the pits, and his party facing almost certain and heavy losses in the fall, Bush may yet yield to the neocon temptation. For unlike LBJ in 1968, he does not seem reconciled to going back to his ranch as a failed president.

Did Jessica Simpson just get hotter?

Maybe...

Clogger

Blogger.com / Blogspot has been having server problems. Sorry if it's been slow or impossible to get in and/or comment.

O'Reilly doesn't attack

Nice montage at Media Matters, by way of 1337hax0r.com

Winnie

One day in the not-too-distant future...

A young New Haven woman named Winifred is dragged into the woods and raped by Herbert, a quiet man she occasionally saw at church.

Bruised and bleeding, and her clothes in tatters, she stumbles onto Route 34.

Finally, she thinks, a bit of good luck: a black Escalade pulls over, its driver a kindly, older man in a suit — a US Senator named Joe. A Democrat, no less.

Joe drives to within a few hundred yards of the nearest hospital. Ever the gentleman, he opens the door for Winnie and explains he has to hurry home in time for Leno, who's doing five minutes of fresh Lewinsky jokes.

After two hours in the waiting room, she begs an attendant for a dose of RU-486. "We don't kill babies here," explains the attendant, sweetly. "There might be another hospital in town that does, but it would be wrong for me to tell you which one." Winnie gets as far as the front door before she passes out.

The next day, Winnie drives to the last abortion clinic in Connecticut, where the prospect of bearing Herbert, Jr. is relegated to her frequent nightmares. The laws have recently been changed to allow abortions only in the event of rape. After examining her extensive wounds, the doctor reluctantly agrees to make Winnie her last patient before she moves her practice to Canada.

At Herbert's trial, his lawyer breaks down while describing how his client — a god-fearing man — lost his unborn child to a ruthless baby-killer. As one, the jury asks if they can hand in their not-guilty verdict immediately, thus saving the tedious walk to the deliberation room.

The judge nods his assent. "Since you weren't raped," he intones at Winnie, "I remand you to the jailhouse, for the crime of Murder in the First Trimester."

In her last minutes on death row, Winnie is allowed a final phone call. A young deacon interrupts the Archbishop, who's sharing a brandy with a kindly, older man in a suit. "Some woman named Winifred wants to know if the Church is still opposed to capital punishment," says the deacon. His Excellency furrows his brow for some time, until Joe pipes up: "Tell her to call back tomorrow." They all share a laugh. "Very good, Joe," says the Archbishop, "very good."

______

In case you're wondering what this is all about, see:

• firedoglake
  
• huffington post
  

Lieberman's expecting a rape victim to hop from hospital to hospital to find one that will prevent her from bearing the child of her attacker is one of the lowest things I've heard from a politician, and even more outrageous from a so-called Democrat.

I bought the law

Put aside, if you can, the terrifying implications of Bush's "Ownership Society" extending into owning your own police force.

Could somebody please explain the benefits of replacing $18-30K/yr police with $700-900/day rent-a-cops? Over the course of a year that's $255-328K per hired gun.

Oh, and here is what CorpWatch has to say about prospective contractors DynCorp and Blackwater.

New kid on the blogs

If liberal blogs were dollars, there'd be enough to buy Duke Cunningham's vote and take Tom Delay to St. Andrews.

Thus, I'm extremely grateful to the good folks at The Sideshow, Pen-Elayne, and World O' Crap for shining a spotlight on this little corner of the Web. If you're not already a regular visitor of these champions of democratic thought, well what are you waiting for?

Impeachment is the best medicine

When the administration and media are gleefully defiling the greatest country on earth, those Gridiron Club dinners really turn the knife.

Remember this bit of comedy gold?

Alright, I'll grudgingly admit Dubya delivered a pretty good line this time:

"When Dick first heard my approval rating was 38 percent, he said, 'What's your secret?'"

McCain again

Jane at firedoglake is getting the word out on McCain. And again.

Lineman for the country

Everyone knows the main line of the story: Pat Tillman gave up a lucrative NFL career to defend his country after 9/11, and he paid the ultimate price.

Reading the words of Jeremy Staat, who's following in Tillman's footsteps, one has to wonder if he's been living in the Fox / Limbaugh news bubble, where the blare of pre-fab "patriotism" drowns out the story's tragic coda. Staat says:

"[Enlisting] is probably one of the best decisions I've made in my life."

"I should have been there for him."

"It's about looking out for your fellow soldier, and being ready to take a bullet for someone."

This just doesn't sound like what you'd say if you knew your buddy had been killed by his fellow soldiers, the facts of his death twisted into a recruiting-poster fable and shrouded by an extensive cover-up.

And things, of course, are much worse than when Tillman joined to fight in Afghanistan, in a war nearly every American supported. The prime target then was Bin Laden — until Bush declared "I don't think much about him." His people obviously didn't think much about Tillman and his family, either.

Thank you, Private Staat, for standing up for your country. I hope in your case, your country returns the favor.

Seek not to be like evil men

There must be a special circle in Hell for people who know better, but who side with the bad guys anyway.

At least Colin Powell occasionally seems tortured about the shameful day he sold bullshit to the United Nations.

McCain has acknowledged that Bush's gang made push-polling calls that claimed the ex-POW had fathered an illegitimate black baby. So he knows better.

Dubya has squandered so amazingly much — America's good name, thousands of lives, trillions of dollars, and so on and so on. And when the chips are down, McCain keeps coming through for him.

I admit to having been intrigued by the speculated Kerry-McCain 2004 ticket. It promised some intriguing "anybody-but-Bush" potential. But for 2008, or anytime before or after, McCain me no McCains, sir.

Unreal Time

Argh! Once again, Bill Maher mangled the facts on the warrantless-spying scandalito!

Week after week, he says he cuts the prez slack on that issue because he lives near a busy port and worries about security. If Maher moves to South Dakota to escape the noise of cargo ships and abortion clinics, he'll presumably join the liberal mainstream on this.

The usually astute Gloria Steinem (ageless feminist dreamboat) couldn't pin the fact tail on the FISA donkey either, nor did co-panelists Larry Miller (charming character actor / illogical conservative dunderhead) and Ramesh Ponnuru (ignoramus or bald-faced liar).

Bill, Gloria, et al.: there is no legal speedbump impeding terrorism surveillance. As has been widely reported (and ignored), the feds can start legitimate surveillance with no prior approval, as long as they apply for a rubber-stamp court order within three days.

Whose genocide are you on?

Great piece at Sadly, No! about Instapundit Glenn Reynolds.

Reynolds quotes include:

Civilized societies have found it harder, though, to beat the barbarians without killing all, or nearly all, of them. Were it really to become all-out war of the sort that Osama and his ilk want, the likely result would be genocide — unavoidable, and provoked, perhaps, but genocide nonetheless, akin to what Rome did to Carthage, or to what Americans did to American Indians.

You know you've found a true friend when you systematically slaughter a race, and he calls the other guys "barbarians."

What becomes a scandal least?

This week, the warrantless-spying scandal was crated up and shipped to the warehouse where they store the lost ark. There it joins such unremembered gems as "Senate panel's GOP staff pried on Democrats."

Merriam-Webster defines "scandal" as:

conduct that causes or encourages a lapse of faith

If a scandal falls on deaf ears, it isn't a scandal at all. And since no one really cares about them, we need a new word to describe the Repubs' myriad violations of decency, ethics, and what used to be called "law."

Henceforth, let us call them "Scandalitos."

Two months from now:

Harry: "Hey, did you hear that Bush secretly authorized anthrax as a vegetable in school lunches?"

Bob: "Whatever, that's just a scandalito."

I sure hope it catches on, if just for the punful day when Sam Alito bangs the last nail into one of those shipping crates — in the unlikely event a scandalito gets that close to being punished.

Dubya on Dubai flak

Bush said:

"I'm concerned about a broader message this issue could send to our friends and allies around the world, particularly in the Middle East."

Shaking his head, he continued, "I'm afraid this policy just doesn't pass the global test."

OK, Dems-who-authorized-the-Iraqi-War

Listen, you've got two choices on how to come clean about your part in this:

1. Saddam was stonewalling the mandated weapons inspectors, so we gave the president a big stick that would enable the inspectors to do their job. "No one could have anticipated" (it's our turn to work that magic phrase, no?) that President Bush would start a war after the force we authorized completely succeeded in opening up an unprecedented level of inspections access.
2. We were pussies — but with good reason. We were totally outnumbered in every part of the government, and we'd have been run out of town on a rail by a right-wing biased news media and — let's all be honest here — by you, our constituents. I talked with a lot of you then, as I weighed my decision, and I went with what you wanted instead of what you needed. It was our job to protect you and this great country. I'm sorry we let you down — we should have stood up to the Republicans, the media, and even to you, dear voters, because it was wrong to trust Bush with this power. It was wrong to let obviously trumped-up war "evidence" slide, because it has cost the country dearly. We apologize profoundly, and will rededicate ourselves to governing in accordance with our better angels, which is what you voted us in to do before we got lost in the fog of war.

Are not both of these statements 100% true? Equivocating hasn't been working, so let's give the unvarnished truth a chance.

I lovermont

Go for it, Bernie!

It all comes of liking Ronnie so much

Part of Ronald Reagan's genius was to die at a point when American jingoism was literally out of control. So a generation of young people will know him only as a red, whitewashed, and blue yankee-doodle hero.

For those of us old enough to know better, the news that another GOP scandal worthy of Reagan or Nixon has been chucked under the rug sparks a wave of nightmare nostalgia and mixed metaphors.

Reagan took up shop after the country had a little nervous breakdown. And could you blame it after Vietnam, Watergate, and the energy / hostage crises? America simply decided it couldn't hack another day of Jimmy Carter's malaise reality, so it took a flier into Peggy Noonan's fantasy land.

As depressing as gas rationing was, seeing your countrymen lose their values and grip on reality was worse. It was Omelas.

Then, as the Reagan years were ending, something happened that wasn't from some mass post-traumatic stress syndrome. The media decided it liked Peggy Noonan's fantasy land, too.

Listen, kids: from the moment a reporter named Ted Koppel cut thoughtful statesman Mike Dukakis off at the knees with "you just don't get it," image-is-everything politics has been the order of the day around here, and we are a much poorer nation for it.

Possibly the tipping point was an earlier assault on Mr. D's patellae — Bernard Shaw's infamous "if Kitty Dukakis were raped..." question. Or did it happen earlier still?

When do you think the US news media officially lost its soul, and condemned us to keep living in Ronnie's "foul is fair" world? Just something to think about when you're, say, pulling into Reagan National Airport.

Move over Zell and Lieberman

There's an even worse Democrat out there. Way out there.

Operation Pandora

One week into this thing, and the Administration has me licked.

United States Ambassador Zalmay Khalilzad has again admitted that the U.S. has created a "Pandora's box" in Iraq. If that's their sugar-coated version, what exactly is there left for a liberal blogger to expose?

New rule: repubs can't bemoan "the politics of personal destruction"

Hey Tom, where were you when Bill Clinton needed you?

Stupid Darwin

Henry Morris (registration required), pater noster of "Creation Science," died February 25th.

He once explained his position thusly:

"The final and conclusive evidence against evolution is the fact that the Bible denies it."

"There," he added, "I've run rings around you logically!"

Bush as Alvy Singer

In Annie Hall, two Borscht Belt jokes sum up Woody Allen's philosophy.

Dubya's attitude always reminds me of two movie gags:

1. When the 3 Stooges are trapped by would-be punishers, they grab a pair of drinking cups, hold them up to their eyes, and invoke the old rule that you can't hit a man wearing glasses. Bush's version: start a needless, endless war, then you're above reproach — because you're a "war president."
   
2. From Animal House, when Otter trashes Flounder's brother's car, he explains: "You can't spend your whole life worrying about your mistakes! You fucked up - you trusted us! Hey, make the best of it!" Bush's version: "You fucked up, you let me start a war. Now you've got to finish it!"

Another Oscar thing...

...is this the best-of-times Oscars or the worst-of-times?

From the movies I've seen, none of them are bad, and there's no brassy, shallow Titanic or Gladiator hogging up slots that should go to better movies.

On the other hand, were any of the nominated movies truly great? It seems like there are many very good movies these days, but where are the great ones? My vote for the last great one: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

Oscar-night hopeful

I haven't had the chance to see all the nominated movies.

It really bugged me when Billy Crystal's jokes revealed the gender-bender ending of The Crying Game.

If there's something off-beat going on with Brokeback Mountain or Transamerica, I hope Jon Stewart won't spill the beans.

Why not Gore?

This past week on Bill Maher's Real Time, the host suggested that Bush benefits from "Fuck-up Fatigue" — a public immunized by constant injections of GOP scandals and fiascoes.

On the same episode, Graydon Carter trumpeted Al Gore's leadership on global warming.

Remember when American life was so good that voters had the luxury of letting exhaustion from sex-scandal hype turn the choice between proven leadership* and a smarmy, impulsive twit into a horse-race?

If our grandchildren's future is a Mad Max dystopia, perhaps someone will pass down to the last toothless waif the story of a great empire so well-off, it didn't feel the need for leaders of intelligence, nuance, and integrity.

* GWB: "I'm surprised I won. I was up against peace, prosperity, and incumbency. "

Fruit barglers of the world, unite!

If you haven't been watching The Colbert Report lately, you're missing out on a Golden Age. As the true Papa Bear (or is it Papa 'Bert?) said in an interview early on, it's going to be hard to sustain that much original writing. Well, pity the show-makers' neglected families, because they're working hard, it's hard work, and they're doing a Brownie-like heck of a job.

In case you've somehow found my obscure liberal blog and yet haven't managed to catch the program that follows The Daily Show, Colbert plays an O'Reilly-esque buffoon with an uncanny ability to ward off facts with absurd, neo-con truthiness.

Not enough to make the 2000 election and all the horrors since OK, but...

... we can take the tiniest bit of solace that this Republicrat isn't our VP.

Missouri bill would make Christianity the state's official "majority religion"

A story from www.kmov.com (account required) , cited on several blogs, says that pending House Concurrent Resolution 13...

... would recognize "a Christian god," and it would not protect minority religions, but "protect the majority's right to express their religious beliefs."

The resolution also recognizes that, "a greater power exists," and only Christianity receives what the resolution calls, "justified recognition."

The bill has been slowed down by debate on whether to make the Show-Me State's official trait "sanctimoniousness" or "intolerance."

"Bush Hails India Ties," msnbc.com

Elaborating, the president said, "the Madras ones are particularly nice." He also thanked the country for its role in the creation of Thanksgiving.

Bad couple of weeks for Bush/Cheney -- will it last?

Will Dubya and Dick ride again, or will a growing majority of Americans see them for the corrupt incompetents that they are?

Anyone see this in mainstream press?

This Cheney e-mail cache sounds like a big story. What's going on?

Warning: this guy is being groomed to be your president

After acknowledging Massachusetts's anti-discrimination laws that protect gay adoption rights, Governor Mitt Romney suggested that...

"... legislation may need to be filed to provide an exemption based on religious principles."

In a separate briefing, Romney told a group of Jihadists that they can file for an exemption from anti-terrorism laws, as long as their attacks are religiously motivated.

If the congressional elections were held today...

...the GOP could lose control of both chambers — something Dick Cheney has recent experience with.

What if it happened like this, #1

What if a woman cut the arms off her baby while listening to "Kill You." There would be Eminem boycotts from here to Dade County.

Instead, the alleged killer's music of choice was the hymn, "He Touched Me." Where are the calls to ban that? Even if she's found innocent, it's still a pretty creepy title.

Good news, everybody!

Bush is going after Osama Bin Laden! And only four-and-a-half years after 9/11!